A Cog Building Poem

I saw a 5-story on the street

I wondered what cogs we'd meet

This mouse said we should go inside

Didn't think we'd make it out alive

So I got a few friends together

To bring them it took forever

So at once we all jumped in

Just knowing that we would win

So we arrived on the first story

4 stories away from glory

On this floor we met a Pickpocket

From whom I had to get a sprocket

So I slammed a pie in his face-BOOM

And the little cog met his doom

But all wasn't over, because there was more

A Fraudster and a Fundraiser walked out the door

So we dealt with them, and swifty too

And on we went to story two.

The twin doors opened and we all ran out

The cogs didn't know what the fuss was about

But we'd come to fight them, most important of all

To bump off these cogs, mean, lean and tall

A Forex Trader and Asset Manager stood in the way

But they weren't the only cogs we'd encounter today

Because a Market Analyst waddled right into the fight

With its cog health meter shining green and bright (but not for long)

We bust them up, mostly thanks to me

And so we advanced to story three.

Now story three was a little tougher you see

With 3 angry cogs staring at me.

Value Vulture, Cashflow Croc and Mortgage Monster were there

"I'll use lure on 'em," said an orange bear.

So he took out those hypno-goggles and did his best

He lured the vulture, but couldn't get the rest

The vulture was stupid and fell right through a trap

Falling back onto the floor with a resounding "SLAP"

He spun his torso and exploded on the spot

Leaving just a tiny cog gear the size of a dot

The other two cogs felt angry for their friend

And vowed to battle 'till the end

So we fought and we fought

In the midst of the onslaught

I birthday-caked the furious croc

And caused him anaphylactic shock

While my toon comrades broke the Monster's ears

And to this day the only sound it hears

Is the sound of silence, loud and clear.

The cogs were beaten, there was no more

So we sallied fourth to story four

Now there wasn't a floor quite like No.4

They were the same cogs we'd fought before

Except this time a Black-Adder was around

Who vowed to have us toons tied and bound

So what did we do? We resisted of course

And our resistance was led by a purple horse

She dropped an anvil on the vulture's head

And tossed a fruit pie to ensure it was dead

A red dog used sound on the other three

And as for the waterworks, that was up to me

I hosed down the skelecog, and left him soaking wet

And a drenched Mortgage Monster sure had a reason to fret

The water had ruined his entire suit

And was covered in fluid from head to foot

The croc on the other hand, missed every attack

Taking all opportunities to strike us back

A pie slice, a squirt gun, quicksand to make him drown

But this old cog just wouldn't go down!

And that mouse's laff was a completely different story

As the situation became more gory

We barely managed to make it through

I told the horse "It's all thanks to you!"

"No problem," she replied, "We worked as a team."

But there was just one thing preventing the coming of our dream

The menacing, malevolent last floor

In which the cogs had to settle a score

So honouring our promises to continually strive

We marched onwards to story five.

The elevator brought us face-to-face

With some of the meanest cogs in the place

Property Piranha, Tax Lion and Bloomberg stared us down

Their faces twisted in a stern, angry frown

And quicker than a football coin toss

The Bloomberg exclaimed "I'm the boss."

So as per usual we let the pies fly

Those gooey things soared ceiling-high

But all of a sudden "Oh rats" the bear hissed

And there a good reason-our gags had MISSED.

Off they went by, without a trace

An angry scowl forming on my face

These cogs played dirty, these cogs were unfair

These cogs fought right down to the last hair

Picking off my comrades one by one

Until the game was no longer any fun.

First went the mouse, for all his hard work

Was condemned to the playground, healing treasures to lurk

He was caught off guard, swept off his feet

Defeated by none other than the lethal tax sheet

Then the axe fell on the horse's neck

Banished forever to the lower deck

A single bite from a cold-hearted fish

Blotted out her very last wish (to complete the building)

For even though she was the heart and soul (of the team)

The effect of 4 previous stories had taken its toll

As the once-great horse collapsed like a ragdoll.

Third in line was the bright orange bear

Who was in a position to accept any dare

The mighty fish had struck again

Leaving a laff defecit of ten

A chomp off the old block

Sent big old grizzly growling back to the dock.

That was it, 3 were gone-it was down to me

But I took a golf ball to the knee

As the great cog cried "Off to tee!"

With my options shrinking, and time running out

My chances of victory I began to doubt

With one last push, I dropped a safe from up high

But the big bot just wouldn't die.

The boss of the room said, "It's the pound for you."

And with that, got rid of me too.

But the weapon that was the death of me

Was the the ever so crucial power key

And so alas, the end of our dreams

As our plan of action burst into seams.

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